A Health Checkup Plan for the Year After Your Spouse Dies

The year after a spouse dies can disrupt sleep, appetite, concentration, medication routines, and appointments. Those changes may be related to grief, but new or worsening symptoms should not be assumed to be “just grief.”

Book a primary-care appointment if care was deferred during caregiving or administration. This guide helps prepare the visit; it does not diagnose symptoms or set an individual screening schedule.

Bring changes to a clinician instead of deciding on your own which ones grief explains.

Prepare a one-page health summary

Include current prescriptions, over-the-counter medicines, supplements, allergies, diagnoses, surgeries, clinicians, pharmacy, and insurance. Note medication changes since the death and any doses that are often missed. Bring bottles or an accurate medication list; do not stop a prescription without medical advice.

List symptoms with dates and patterns: sleep, appetite, weight, pain, digestion, breathlessness, palpitations, dizziness, falls, memory, mood, alcohol or substance use, and ability to manage ordinary tasks. Record facts rather than trying to diagnose yourself.

If symptoms could indicate an emergency—such as severe chest pain, major breathing difficulty, signs of stroke, serious injury, or immediate risk of self-harm—use emergency services rather than waiting for a routine appointment.

Restore preventive care individually

Ask the clinician which vaccines, screenings, dental care, vision care, hearing assessment, and bone or cardiovascular risk reviews apply to your age, history, and prior results. USPSTF recommendations are population guidance, not a personal schedule; other professional bodies may differ.

Bring dates of the last relevant tests and family history. Ask what benefit, harm, preparation, and follow-up each recommended test involves. “Annual” is not a universal interval for every screening.

Discuss sleep precisely

NIA identifies sleep difficulty as a possible grief reaction. Tell the clinician when sleep changed, how long it takes to fall asleep, awakenings, snoring or breathing concerns, naps, caffeine, alcohol, medications, and daytime impairment.

Avoid using alcohol or someone else’s sedative as a sleep strategy. Ask about medication interactions, fall risk, driving, and non-drug approaches appropriate to you. If a device or app records sleep, treat it as supplementary information rather than a diagnosis.

Check nutrition, movement, and safety

Eating alone, losing a household cook, or managing a different budget can change nutrition. Ask for help if preparing food, swallowing, dental problems, nausea, or weight change interferes with eating. A registered dietitian can provide individualized guidance when appropriate.

Discuss safe movement based on your conditions and current ability. Start below the level that creates injury or exhaustion. Review fall hazards, vision, footwear, and balance if relevant. At home, verify locks, lighting, smoke and carbon-monoxide alarms, emergency contacts, and medication storage.

Verify coverage before it becomes a reason to delay

Confirm active insurance, primary-care assignment, network status, referrals, prior authorization, and expected cost directly with the insurer. Medicare’s Care Compare can help locate participating providers, but confirm acceptance and appointment availability with the office.

If coverage changed after the death, keep notices and enrollment confirmations. For disputes, record the date, representative, reference number, and written basis. Do not share a Medicare number or other identifier with an unsolicited caller.

Include mental health in ordinary care

Tell the clinician how grief affects functioning, not only whether you feel sad. Ask about licensed counseling, bereavement groups, and urgent support. SAMHSA notes that some people experience symptoms that warrant additional clinical help; only a qualified professional can assess or diagnose.

Call or text 988 in the United States for crisis support, and use emergency services for immediate danger. You do not need to wait for a particular anniversary or severity label to ask for help.

Leave with a documented plan

Before the visit ends, confirm which tests or referrals are ordered, medication changes, warning signs, follow-up timing, and whom to call with questions. Use the patient portal or after-visit summary to correct misunderstandings. Add the next appointment to a calendar and tell one trusted person if transportation or company would help.

For choosing support, see How to Choose a Grief Counselor.